Monday, 26 November 2018

Hospital loneliness

I'm currently writing this blog post from my hospital bed, I've been here 24 hours and successfully finished one book, cried enough tears to fill my array of sick bowls around me, and well on that matter - also thrown up in far too much far too quickly so that the nurses are now struggling to keep up with the rate of my stomach repelling! - Good times!

I wanted to touch on a subject that I have posted about a few times on my Instagram but not so much on here, and that is the loneliness in hospitals, particularly as someone who is chronically sick.

The reason why I mention the focus is more so on someone who is chronically sick is because hospitals are indeed familiar places to us, we have our array of doctors to help manage every aspect of our chronic illness, and as such we are used to knowing our way around these hospitals... not to mention being admitted for ill health or arriving in A&E is very much something we have history with, more so than someone who has just broken their leg and is in for an overnight admission, but all the same - hospitals are incredibly lonely places whoever and whatever you are in for! 

I wrote a recent post about how my mindset has developed this year about life generally and chronic illness, I feel more confident in my "unknown" future and really try to aim high rather than being angry and sad with life for my chronic conditions like I once was.

Yet, despite all of this progress, my most recent hospital admission reinforced that yes, I was strong, yes I had been dealt with a crappy hand, and was dealing with it, considerably well in my opinion... I was still petrified. 

The hospital I was admitted to - Charring Cross, I visit a couple of times a month, for different doctors across different departments throughout the hospital, not to mention I have had overnight stays there rather a lot-  its suffice to say I knew the building.

Though its something else laying alone, in a ward full of strangers also considerably unwell and scared themselves, being poked and prodded every hour for your observations, being sent down for scans through the night, lack of privacy.. waiting all day on that one visitor who is making a trek in, or perhaps like myself some days I had a handful of my loved ones wanting to visit me.. all arriving near enough within the same hour..

so when they left? I was by myself back being woken from my constant naps for the next round of IVs, to be asked if I had gone to the toilet yet...

I dont write this to moan and complain - (ok slightly needing to vent!)

Though, this is my reminder to you, please don't forget about us! 

if you know someone who is admitted in hospital, reach out to them, flowers and cards can be lovely, but if you have time and its not too far away, we much prefer having YOU even just sitting there next to our beds, makes the world of difference when our days drag into one. 

"The Hopeful Chronic"

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